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Alcohol and the weekend: The staple of any college movie or Copper Beach teenage keg party.
The only problem is that the only spirits you can buy on Sundays are ones you purchase from your grandmother when she's hogging the scotch, and even she knows it's illegal.
Well, soon, you may not have to worry about trading hard-earned money for Nana's secret stash. A bill may soon be proposed for the 2008 general election for the legalization of alcohol sales on Sundays for Columbia residents.
The mayor supports it. The random hobo down the street may support it. It turns out so do I.
The ban on alcohol sales outdates its usefulness. Sure, I understand the Bible Belt we live in and their right to make Sunday a "no-Funday" for everyone. But just like pet rocks, side ponytails and "According to Jim," this law has simply lost its reason to exist.
Will alcohol suddenly create a crazy spike in alcohol-related accidents as Sunday night partiers get tipsy before the first day of a long week? Well, according to some statistics conducted by the Behavioral Health Research Center, it can raise these kinds of accidents by 29 percent.
It makes sense considering many accidents in a college town would probably be caused by Drunken Student Joe going on a beer run after he and his buddies drank and threw beer cans at each other all night … and perhaps not in that order.
But choosing just one day a week to ban alcohol purchases for home use is just like saying I can't practice my Bruce Lee fighting moves in a yellow jumpsuit on Sundays; either way, I'll just get my fix the day before.
This ban has been around for several years, and those of high moral character more than likely think it should be upheld. These same people, however, probably think all alcohol should find its way into the "Do Not Purchase Under Penalty of Hypocritical Stares" category, so it may not be so much about Sundays as it is the principle.
And those of you who do enjoy the occasional glass of wine or giant cask, the alcohol ban has more than likely been an inconvenience more than a deterrent. I am sure several people have had the spur of the moment idea to grab a bottle of wine in order to survive the surprise visit of in-laws for a Sunday dinner.
Because of the ban, however, you have to sit through Uncle Ned's story of how his adult diapers are the greatest invention since the waterbed.
I realize that many people do agree with me on this, but it's important to bring this issue to light for those who may be voting on it very soon in the coming year. We may soon be able to grab that quick six-pack for friends for a big Sunday night football game.
And for many lazy people like myself, it may be the only kind of six-pack we'll ever have on a Sunday.
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