Second ‘Breaking Dawn’ ends saga with overdone dramatics, uneven pacing
If I could just have a moment of your time, I would like to take this opportunity to celebrate the ending of the one of the most beloved and most hated film series. Thank you.
But in all seriousness, this made-for-Lifetime series has finally met its last chapter, ending the fantasy for the die-hard tween lovers and the nightmare for the hard-core haters. And does “The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 2” give a finale worth boasting about?
The answer is not really, basically because we still have the same fantasy crap that has been poisoning our society since the first book, but I’m going to write this review with as much of an open mind as I can.
The biggest problem with “Breaking Dawn – Part 2” is probably the uneven pacing from start to finish. Director Bill Condon strives to make everything more cinematic while staying true to the source material, resulting in an odd balance of intentional and unintentional comedy, sweeter moments and all of the steam the fans crave.
When last we saw the newlyweds, Edward (Robert Pattinson) had turned Bella (Kristen Stewart) into a vampire to prevent her from dying during childbirth. Now she’s a full bloodsucker boasting about how a life of mountain lion devouring and cliff jumping suits her (this time not trying to kill herself).
Throughout the entire series, Stewart’s acting has been bland, boring and deader than undead. By now, she has definitely become more comfortable in the role, as have Pattinson and Taylor Lautner in theirs. As a vampire, she’s allowed to act livelier than in the past films, but her acting still hasn’t improved because the writers can’t give her a piece of dialogue that isn’t laughable.
Even though she’s married to the love of her life as a ravenous and hyper-alert vampire, Bella still has problems. The Volturi have mistaken Bella’s rapidly growing daughter, Renesmee, as an Immortal Child, a savage little creature that destroys instead of throwing sippie cups in a fit of rage.
Still around is werewolf Jacob (Lautner), who once rivaled Edward for Bella’s affections, because he (and I’m not kidding here) “imprinted” on Renesmee when she was born. Apparently, this means Jacob is now paired with the 7-year-old vampire. I just wonder how the filmmakers managed to slip that through the MPAA rating.
These three lead actors just do all of the same things they’ve been doing throughout the entire series. There’s that greatly anticipated moment when Jacob takes his shirt off (cliche to talk about, I know), so anticipated that the camera soaks in every detail. Pattinson and Stewart also steam things up with another sex scene but, due to the PG-13 rating, you don’t get to see much of Stewart. It’s become tedious just in time for the finale.
The supporting cast doesn’t offer much for entertainment either. Michael Sheen (as Aro, the leader of the Volturi) just hams up his entire screen time to the point where it looks like he escaped from “The Rocky Horror Picture Show.” Dakota Fanning supposedly comes off as creepy, and she’s apparently picked up Stewart’s knack for sounding bored with her dialogue. Her lines are basically limited to the word “pain.” My newly adopted baby cousin has more to say.
The climactic action that ensues between the wolf-vampire gang and the overly-dressed-for-the-occasion Volturi does have its share of surprises and visceral moments, but it was all rip-and-tear with cheap, highly CGI-enhanced effects. And too much inane, clumsy dialogue leaves it all completely joyless.
After five years of the “Twilight” popularity being shoved down our society’s throat, I still don’t understand how the franchise has become so popular, other than a vampire’s representation of youthful immortality. I’m just happy I won’t have to see another nightmare of a vampire fantasy film on screen for a while.